Friday, 16 December 2011

New Toy!!!!

So you can make a chart / graph of your moods, leave notes on the stuff that's happening to you, & start to notice & understand any patterns, triggers etc. Could be interesting ... I'll let you know how it goes.

Monday, 5 December 2011

Things To Do When Depressed: 1


So this might sound like the last thing you'd want to do, but I just suffered hrough a nasty week & I had both a gig & a LARP event to go to. I seriously considered bailing, but I know from previous experience that this just gives me another thing to torture myself with while I'm down - failure to commit to my plans, letting my friends down, wasting ticket money, blah blah blah. So this time, I just sucked it up & went. The gig was a bit torturous at first ... making small talk while waiting for the bands wasn't much fun - but once the gig started I threw myself into dancing & cheering & singing, & came out of it feeling briefly better. Music has always helped me through, & a bit of crazy dancing really helped too. Probably those exercise endorphins ... In fact my therapist did tell me that exercising would help, so ... there we are.

The LARP helped too. But then that's a mix of exercise & escapism ... running around pretending to be someone else? No mystery why that helped, really.

Now I don't recommend that you stick to things that are going to involve lots of socialising & talking to people, where you're going to have to keep your mask up all the time, & pretend you're fine when you're really not. That's exhausting & torturous, so probably best avoided. After all, if you give the excuse that you're ill, you're not reallt lying, are you? But things you really enjoy, things you can get lost in, things like clubbing or gigging or anyhing else you really love ... try & do it regardless. Things you enjoy that much will help you lift your mood & get out of the funk ... or at least help you stop sliding any further down.

Status Update: October & November 2011

I've been busy busy busy lately, & now that the dust is finally starting to settle I'm back to update this lil' ol' blog thingy.

Sooo ... October. Let's see ... I was deep in rehearsals for a play & had a major game in my favourite LARP game to prepare for, as well as my new year, Samhain. (Have I mentioned I'm Wiccan? Can't remember. Well, I am.) So I had a lot to do. This meant I didn't have much time for moping or dwelling, & I couldn't wuss out on any of these responsibilities, & my mind was pretty much occupied all the time. I only recall a brief (maybe a week) period of feeling ... mixed up, sometimes buzzing, sometimes drooping ... but I didn't have time to pay it much attention. This seems to work quite well, at least for the less severe moments - just keep busy, don't give your mind time to dwell, to play its tricks, just keep forging ahead until the phase passes.

November, I wasn't quite so lucky. The play went on on the 25th & 26th, so I was still rehearsing like mad up til then, & right after that I had another LARP event - this one a small thing that I had arranged with a group of friends, so I was preparing for that too. Up til these, I was fine - busy, a bit stressed, but fine. Unfortunately right after that I had a week of rather nasty depression - the kind that makes you feel physically unwell as well as just plain miserable. I thought I was catching a cold, but the lack of symptoms except for feeling ridiculously tired (but unable to sleep) & under the weather, followed with the sudden sinking spirits, clued me in. I continued with the keeping busy plan, but it persisted ... I'm only just clawing my way out of it now. Still, I found out a few good things - but I'll put them in a new post. :)

In other news ... happy belated new year to all the Wiccans & other pagans out there!